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♛
"You deserve to be happy. You deserve to live a life you are excited about. Don't let others make you forget that."
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B I O G R A P H Y
Notes: only unexalted dragon with his colors, 1/2 total (12/31/2022)
LORE
______ Nicknamed "puppy" by the other dragons in the clan, Hwajae is notoriously friendly and hyper. Despite this though, he is wise beyond his years and often sits back and watches others, or is found with Yookwang, reading to his heart's content.
______ For reasons unknown, he hasn't grown at all since hatching, and since his egg was found alone, it's not like he can ask his parents. He doesn't let his size stop him, however, and is often seen causing trouble trying to help out. He's friends with practically every dragon in the clan, but has become best friends with Hayoon.
Thanks Vendrus! ♥
► "Take a shower, wash off the day. Drink a glass of water. Make the room dark. Lie down and close your eyes. Notice the silence. Notice your heart. Still beating. Still fighting. You made it, after all. You made it, another day. And you can make it one more. You’re doing just fine."
► "Always assume everyone is doing their best. And if they’re having a day where their best just isn’t that great, or their best doesn’t look like your best, you have to be okay with that."
► “If a person can’t get out of bed, something is making them exhausted. If a student isn’t writing papers, there’s some aspect of the assignment that they can’t do without help. If an employee misses deadlines constantly, something is making organization and deadline-meeting difficult. Even if a person is actively choosing to self-sabotage, there’s a reason for it — some fear they’re working through, some need not being met, a lack of self-esteem being expressed." - “Laziness Does Not Exist” by E Price on Medium [ (And a footnote not explicitly covered in the article: laziness still doesn’t exist when it is you yourself making no progress and not knowing why. You deserve that respect and consideration, too, even from yourself.) ]
► 16 Uncomfortable Feelings That Actually Indicate You're On the Right Path
► "Happiness comes in waves, it’ll find you again."
► Please don't start cutting [linked to Tumblr]
► A Cute Tumblr Story About Relationships and Support (Trigger warning for ED mention and a general warning for swearing)
► "Learning to let go and learning to relax means just freaking sticking those stickers on something. Stop worrying if it’s the right place. burn that nice candle you’ve had for a year. It doesn’t need a special occasion. I’m gonna use those fancy soaps I’ve been collecting in a drawer even though they look so pretty and it means I’ll use them up. everything is temporary so just enjoy the littlest pleasures you can possibly have we all need to just let go and enjoy things while they last. The sticker’s gonna look fine on your water bottle I promise."
► "Whoever’s reading this, I pray that you find happiness. Not temporary happiness, or “if I pretend and put on a smile & laugh, maybe I’ll be happy” kind of happiness, but long lasting real happiness. The kind of happiness that makes ur face glow and lights up your soul. You deserve it."
► "If suddenly you feel the urge to cry come upon you seemingly from nowhere, please, recognize that it is not from nowhere. It is from a somewhere where you forgot to mourn properly. A place only your body can remember. Let these tears come. Let your body mourn. Let your body feel loss. Even if you cannot understand it, (who can?) it is important to let your body have this. When the crying is over feed your body something special and be gentle with it. bless."
► A feel-good Tumblr post about life getting better
► "Shout out to everyone who is still trying to heal from things that they don’t talk about"
► "Nobody talks about how ugly taking care of yourself can be. Yes, sometimes it’s taking a warm bath and texting memes to friends and keeping an aesthetically pretty journal. Sometimes it’s crying silently on your couch at 3am, hugging yourself and reminding yourself that you’re a good person. Self care is not always ‘aesthetic’ and cute…and that’s ok. Don’t be embarrassed, just do what you need to do."
► "All of this is temporary."
► "To all of you that are having a bad day, week, month, or whatever, I feel you. Don’t get discouraged, keep your head up. You can do this."
► "🌹 a rose, for any sad today. I love you."
► Calming Masterpost [link to my tumblr]
► "Look, tomorrow you will wake up and feel a bit better, a bit calmer. You are going to figure things out eventually, it doesn't have to all be done tonight. Take a deep breath, relax your shoulders, and get some rest. You will manage."
► "Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give but cannot. All of that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go."
► "Switch your mentality from “I’m broken and helpless” to “I’m growing and healing” and watch how fast your life changes for the better."
► "Even if you’re unemployed, even if you’re taking time off from school, even if nobody is calling and making plans with you, get out of bed, take a shower, put on clean clothes, wear some cologne or perfume, turn all the lights on, do some laundry, clean up a little bit.
Doing all this stuff causes a shift in your perspective. Do it in spite of your situation...
A lot of [Tumblr] has fallen into the trap of equating being pro people-who-struggle-with-mental-illness with being anti-recovery, and even goes so far as to glorify and enable maladaptive symptoms and behaviors. This is a monumentally stupid idea. Illnesses and disorders are called that for a reason. They are not Cake and Happy Funtimes. They make you miserable, they make the people around you miserable, and everything sucks.
Posts that say “Keep trying to do this thing, even when you struggle with it,” are saying that for a reason. It’s fighting back against the illness, refusing to let it claim you. Yeah, it’s hard! Yeah, it sucks! Yeah, it’s okay for you to take a break if you need to! Yeah, it’s perfectly fine if you can’t do it alone and need to ask for help! Sometimes lots of help! But keep fighting. Keep resisting. It’s your life at stake." original reblog - cursing warning
► "If you’re mentally ill, and you still get up everyday to face the world, you’re strong as [heck]."
► "You’re gonna survive. And good things are gonna start to happen again. And one day you may even look back and even this will not be such a bad thing."
► "Not to be a downer, but your twenties are super hard and super lonely, and tv lied and it’s not glamorous at all. And if you are having a hard time it’s ok and it’s normal and you’ll be ok."
► "You are not your intrusive thoughts. They’re kinda like weeds. Yeah, they’re in the garden, but you sure as heck didn’t plant them."
► "hey let’s normalize doing little things to help ourselves! Opening a window sure won’t cure my personality disorders, but it will cool down my room and give me fresh air if I haven’t left the house for a while! Taking your vitamins won’t cure your depression, but it will prevent you from getting vitamin deficiencies if you forget to eat! Going outside for a while won’t cure mental illness, but it does feel nice! Little things won’t cure us, but they will help manage things. These things aren’t “neurotypical”, they are ways of surviving!"
► "Advice for People Who Are Not Having a Good Day:
• wait until it gets dark and make tea or coffee or hot chocolate, or if it’s too hot outside make yourself a healthy smoothie with your favorite things in it at any point during the day
• put on your favorite underwear, it helps, trust me, it’s an old family secret (i’m not kidding)
• if you have a pet, play the “how many things can i stick on you until you move or get mad” game (bonus points if they fall asleep, extra bonus points if a family member sees you and tells you to quit it, extra double ultra points if they join in)
• rip a piece of paper into as many little pieces as you can
• go to animeseason.com and click “random anime” until you see one that looks completely ridiculous (or actually good) and watch the first episode. repeat if it sucked or if you get bored halfway through
• spend at least an hour making a music playlist for how you feel right now and save it for now or when you feel a bad mood rise again
• curl up in bed and cover yourself with blankets and pillows and put in music and just lay there for a while (sleeping is also good)
• eat everything
• drink lots of water
• it’s okay bad moods don’t last forever!!!!!! i promise!!! you will be yourself soon and there are people who love you very much, don’t be afraid to reach out to them
• you are lovely
• eat lots of bananas
• here are some more friends
• i bet there is still a box of crayons in your house somewhere (if not you can get them cheap during back-to-school sales); find them and use them (maybe while watching ridiculous anime)
• sunshine if you can manage it or just a sun lamp trust me it matters more than you think especially in winter
• hugs even if they are stuffed animals or your pet or your pillow whatever is on hand
• if you’ve got a favorite lotion/soap/thing that is scented use it liberally
• cry if you need, if it doesn’t start by itself or if you don’t want to attract attention put on a sad movie so you have an excuse
• write this down to pull out on future bad days:
it is okay to have a day where you don’t get things done
it is okay not to have a reason for feeling bad
• taking care of yourself is a worthwhile use of time
• if you still don’t feel better it is not your fault (and it is okay to ask for help)
• Look after yourself, take time to care for yourself.
• We’re here."
► Another self-help masterpost
► "Hey friendly psa/reminder that with the seasons changing[during fall and winter], a lot of people with mood disorders (and even people without them) can get all messed up and wonky from that, so try to go a little easy on yourself if you find yourself spiraling or getting emotional a lot lately okay? You're doing your best. Love you."
► "This is what recovery is like. This is what being depressed is like, and it’s why we stay. Because even when we’re sure this is it, this is the last day we can put up with it, this is the last hour, the last second - some part of us remembers these moments, and thinks - what if tomorrow has one of them.
I used to joke I have bad days and worse days. I almost never do well. I feel like I keep barely a nose above the water.
But in those rare, rare, rare seconds where the waves stop for one second and I catch sight of something other than dark, I see it. The way a rose looks after a rain. how my mother smiles when she knows it’s my favorite meal that’s cooking. my best friend looking over his shoulder to flip me off again. The bike I rode at 7 and crashed at 17. A little bug struggling with five little legs - but walking, walking.
Recovery isn’t smashing into these moments and realizing it’s finally happened, what those people said is true and it “all gets better.” Recovery is remembering those moments and deciding - I want them back. It’s looking for them. Sometimes it takes hours. Sometimes days. Sometimes months without any sight of them. But you look, you search even when you’re too tired to keep your eyes open, because you promised yourself … tomorrow. Tomorrow will be the day we find one. A four leaf clover we know is our sign, the rainbow, the wishing well - the way out.
And when you find one, they get easier. Four leaf clovers always grow in the same patch, after all. And your eyes get sharper. You figure out what makes any small part of you happy. You figure out that you might not be happy, but it’s good enough to stick around to watch the way oil looks in puddles and how she always cries at New Year’s. And it might not be blisteringly, soul-crushingly happy in the way other people seem to feel things - in that mind-numbing wordless joy that shines in them, that glow I’m so envious of, that effortlessness - but it will be like this, just quiet, a moment of rest, of the shouts dimming for a minute, a peace.
It’s easy to say “I’m depressed, I’ll never be happy.” maybe. I hope not, because I’m still looking. And in these moments I’ve rediscovered that I am funny, that I like the color pink, that kittens and puppies never fail me. In these moments I’m still depressed, still me, still fighting an illness that wants to end me. But I’m fighting. I seek these moments in every second I get because I’m here and breathing and after all this I’m going to be [angry] if this gets the better of me.
Maybe I’ll never figure out how to feel effortless and free. but I know that I feel love when the music is blaring and my hands are out the window and I feel love somewhere on the beach and I feel love watching salamanders wake up in the mornings. It’s not other people’s love, it’s far-off and it’s distant and it might not be “normal”, but it’s goddamn important to me.
I didn’t wake up better. I forced better to come fight me. I’ve been walking towards recovery since I was 19. Five years later and no, I’m not cured, but I see a lot more of these moments. Or maybe they were always there, and only now am I realizing what I got in front of me.
And when it’s been bad again? When I’m not even breathing? When it’s been months since I felt anything, When the stress is too much and the sky is dark and the moon in me has fallen silent? I say: hang on. Tomorrow might be the day we find it. Tomorrow might be worth the fight.
The best part about this? Eventually, I’m right. " - user inkskinned on Tumblr
SUICIDE/SUPPORT HOTLINES:
US Helplines:
Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696
Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433
LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255
Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386
Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743
Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438
**** and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673
Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272
Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000
Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253
Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453
UK Helplines:
Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail jo@samaritans.org
Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111
Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: info@mind.org.uk
Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 legal@mind.org.uk
b-eat eating disorder support: 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: help@b-eat.co.uk
b-eat youthline (for under 25’s with eating disorders): 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm)
Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: helpline@cruse.org.uk
Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0800776600
Drinkline: 0800 9178282
**** Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail info@rapecrisis.org.uk
**** Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight
India Self Harm Hotline: 00 08001006614
India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669
Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868
FREE 24/7 suicide hotlines:
Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430
Australia: 13-11-14
Austria: 01-713-3374
Barbados: 429-9999
Belgium: 106
Botswana: 391-1270
Brazil: 21-233-9191
China: 852-2382-0000
(Hong Kong: 2389-2222)
Costa Rica: 606-253-5439
Croatia: 01-4833-888
Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67
Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908
Denmark: 70-201-201
Egypt: 762-1602
Estonia: 6-558-088
Finland: 040-5032199
France: 01-45-39-4000
Germany: 0800-181-0721
Greece: 1018
Guatemala: 502-234-1239
Holland: 0900-0767
Honduras: 504-237-3623
Hungary: 06-80-820-111
Iceland: 44-0-8457-90-90-90
Israel: 09-8892333
Italy: 06-705-4444
Japan: 3-5286-9090
Latvia: 6722-2922, 2772-2292
Malaysia: 03-756-8144
Singapore: 1-800-221-4444
Mexico: 525-510-2550
Netherlands: 0900-0767
New Zealand: 4-473-9739
New Guinea: 675-326-0011
Nicaragua: 505-268-6171
Norway: 47-815-33-300
Philippines: 02-896-9191
Poland: 52-70-000
Portugal: 239-72-10-10
Russia: 8-20-222-82-10
Spain: 91-459-00-50
South Africa: 0861-322-322
South Korea: 2-715-8600
Sweden: 031-711-2400
Switzerland: 143
Taiwan: 0800-788-995
Thailand: 02-249-9977
Trinidad and Tobago: 868-645-2800
Ukraine: 0487-327715
Anxiety
Things you should not do when anxious:
–Go on a walk
–Watch a sunset, watch fish in an aquarium, watch glitter, etc.
–Go anywhere where the main activity is sitting and watching
–Draw, color, do anything that occupies the hands and not the mind
–Do yoga, jog, go fishing, or anything that lets you mentally drift
–Do literally ANYTHING that gives you great amounts of mental space to obsess and dwell on things.
Things you should do when anxious:
–Do a crossword puzzle, Sudoku, or any other mind teaser game. Crosswords are the best.
–Write something. It doesn’t have to be a masterpiece. Write the Top 10 Best Restaurants in My City. Rank celebrities according to Best Smile. Write some dumb Legolas fanfiction and rip it up when you’re done. It’s not for publication, it’s a relief exercise that only you will see.
–Read something, watch TV, or watch a movie–as long as it’s engrossing. Don’t watch anything which you can run as background noise (like, off the top of my head, Say Yes to The Dress.) As weird as it seems, American Horror Story actually helps me a lot, because it sucks me in.
–Do math problems—literally, google “algebra problems worksheet” and solve them. If you haven’t done math since 7th grade this will really help you. I don’t mean with math, I mean with the anxiety.
–Play a game or a sport with someone that requires great mental concentration. Working with 5 people to get a ball over a net is a challenge which will require your brain to turn off the Sadness Channel.
–Play a video game, as long as it’s not something like candy crush or Tetris that’s mindless.
Things you should do during panic attacks especially:
–List the capitals of all the U.S. states
–List the capitals of all the European countries
–List all the shapes you can see. Or all the colors.
–List all the blonde celebrities you can think of.
–Pull up a random block of text and count all the As in it, or Es, or whatever.
[source] also includes one suggestion redacted to keep this profile PG-13, and some other suggestions not in the original post
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