I have an egg. I don't need an egg. Due to my hardly ever being on FR anymore I don't need dragoncash either. What I could use is some cheering up. Usually the way I cheer myself up is by tormenting my bf with bad puns, but I'm running out of material.
So, a contest. Omelette everyone send in the worst, silliest and most groan inspiring puns you know (limit five per player). They do not have to be egg inspired eggspired. I will decide which one physically hurts me the most, and that person will receive a shiny unhatched ice egg!
Get cracking, kids!
I have an egg. I don't need an egg. Due to my hardly ever being on FR anymore I don't need dragoncash either. What I could use is some cheering up. Usually the way I cheer myself up is by tormenting my bf with bad puns, but I'm running out of material.
So, a contest. Omelette everyone send in the worst, silliest and most groan inspiring puns you know (limit five per player). They do not have to be egg inspired eggspired. I will decide which one physically hurts me the most, and that person will receive a shiny unhatched ice egg!
Get cracking, kids!
are you ready for a good yolk?
At a party, a magician was producing egg after egg from a little boy’s ear.
“There!” he said proudly. “I bet your Mum can’t produce eggs without hens, can she?”
“Oh yes, she can,” said the boy. “She keeps ducks.”
How many eggs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. Eggs don’t have hands.
my brain is scrambling for more...
Why did the hen lay her egg on the axe?
She wanted to hatchet.
What crime is an egg most afraid of?
Poaching.
I was visiting my dear old Grandpa the other day when he said to me, "Let me give you a bit of advice. You can't make an omelette ..."
"Without breaking eggs?" I finished for him.
"No. You can't make an omelette," he said, as he scraped it into the bin.
I'm done
are you ready for a good yolk?
At a party, a magician was producing egg after egg from a little boy’s ear.
“There!” he said proudly. “I bet your Mum can’t produce eggs without hens, can she?”
“Oh yes, she can,” said the boy. “She keeps ducks.”
How many eggs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. Eggs don’t have hands.
my brain is scrambling for more...
Why did the hen lay her egg on the axe?
She wanted to hatchet.
What crime is an egg most afraid of?
Poaching.
I was visiting my dear old Grandpa the other day when he said to me, "Let me give you a bit of advice. You can't make an omelette ..."
"Without breaking eggs?" I finished for him.
"No. You can't make an omelette," he said, as he scraped it into the bin.
I'm done
@
Devilbaby
I love you, I do the same to my boyfriend!
I bought a sheep recently. I decided to name him Relation, because I wanted a better relationsheep!
@
Devilbaby
I love you, I do the same to my boyfriend!
I bought a sheep recently. I decided to name him Relation, because I wanted a better relationsheep!
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Delletion
I've never heard that one. It made me laugh
@
Delletion
I've never heard that one. It made me laugh
These puns are just so eggcrutiatingly painful to read. I mean, really, a pun contest? It's gonna be a real hendful to sort through all of the bad puns you're gonna get, and if you want my advice, try to weed out the ones that are just hamming it up for you. But then, it's your contest and it would be just plain nesty of me to tell you how to do things.
Whatever happens, I'm roostering for everyone here!
@
Devilbaby
These puns are just so eggcrutiatingly painful to read. I mean, really, a pun contest? It's gonna be a real hendful to sort through all of the bad puns you're gonna get, and if you want my advice, try to weed out the ones that are just hamming it up for you. But then, it's your contest and it would be just plain nesty of me to tell you how to do things.
Whatever happens, I'm roostering for everyone here!
@
Devilbaby
*Looks at lair* Ah yes. Organised chaos.
@
Devilbaby
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted,"Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't - I've cut off your arms!"
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him ...A super callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
@
Devilbaby
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted,"Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't - I've cut off your arms!"
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him ...A super callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
@Devilbaby
Do they all have to be puns exactly? I hope these horribly funny jokes suffice. XD
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous. I'm seeing a lot of new faces here this week and I have to say, I'm very disappointed. ;D
What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants?
One's a crusty bus station and the other's a busty crustacean!
[img]https://i.imgur.com/oSq8Xeo.jpg[/img]
[img]https://i.pinimg.com/736x/94/bf/c1/94bfc1d554e5826d626311116a28fc5c--james-bond-james-darcy.jpg[/img]
[img]https://68.media.tumblr.com/56e5a23a808c1ad56b9257bf7f85e791/tumblr_ohfa89Y7fM1s1bdg8o1_500.jpg[/img]
@
Devilbaby
Do they all have to be puns exactly? I hope these horribly funny jokes suffice. XD
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous. I'm seeing a lot of new faces here this week and I have to say, I'm very disappointed. ;D
What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants?
One's a crusty bus station and the other's a busty crustacean!
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she/her - writer - FR+0
but who prays for lucifer?
who in eighteen centuries,
has had the common humanity
to pray for the one sinner
that needed it most?
-- Mark Twain
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Devilbaby okok xD thsi is last... deadline is... ?
@
Devilbaby okok xD thsi is last... deadline is... ?
If a clock gets Hungry, it goes back four seconds
If a clock gets Hungry, it goes back four seconds